Last time I was here, I was a lot younger...

Getting old sucks. Yes, I know it's better than the alternative.  Yes, I know it's a privilege robbed from many.  You're right , I should feel guilty for complaining about living. If it makes you feel better I do. I am awash with guilt. It's my middle name. Whatever. It still sucks.

Everyday I am faced with the harsh realization that I will never be younger, skinnier, more energetic, brighter...really, just fill in the blank. I AM OLD. And it does not help when you work with 20 year olds who ,while I know they are just trying to be kind, insist that you are really quite young, because you are the same age as their Mom and she is young. Really? Thanks.

I mean, where did the time go? It feels like just  yesterday that I was planning life. Such a big huge span of time filled with babies, opportunities and excitement. Now my big plans involve which medications will help me sleep without screwing with my bowel movements, my babies are grown up and I actually feel older than I am. So don't even think about hitting me with that you are only as old as you feel bullshit. If that's the case, I should start plot shopping soon.

In case this post be misconstrued as some sort of rant delivered by just another angry old woman ( which it is), let's just say it's a warning. Better yet, a piece of wisdom imparted by one who has lived long enough to have some helpful insights. Enjoy your youth. If you are 25, you are most definitely not old. If I actually hear you complaining about how old you are again I will corner you and make you listen to me complain about my wrinkles, grey hair, and memory loss. For hours. Hours that you will never get back.  You will wish that you were as deaf as I am and that you could forget what the hell I just said as easily as I can.

Which seems to have brought me full circle. Because quite frankly, I got on this computer to do something and it was not this. Hell if I can remember what it was....